


Seasons

by misswritingobsessed



Category: Bodyguard (TV 2018)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Future, F/M, Happy Ending, Internal Thoughts and Feelings, Seasons, The Affair
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-10-11 15:13:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17449388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misswritingobsessed/pseuds/misswritingobsessed
Summary: Julia thinks about how different her life is through every season.(Set in 2019)





	Seasons

**Author's Note:**

> Tagging is just, awful. The summary isn't amazing either, but I am hope the work itself doesn't suck.

** Winter, 2019. **

Julia Montague makes the decision to work over Christmas and New Year, since the bomb scare in November she feels as thought she is months behind on all of her work, her schedule dies down over the winter months, but she knows it will pick up again come February. Besides, her mother doesn’t do much in the way of celebrating Christmas, and David is with his children and mother in Scotland.

So, the choice she makes is to go into the office, work on something that she hopes will have meaning in the future and throws an apologetic glance over at Kim and Tom for pulling them away from their loved ones at 1:30pm on Christmas Day.

Switching her line of sight between her laptop and the various documents spread out on her desk, she can’t help but let her mind wonder, thinking if the next year will be any different from the last. She isn’t sure she’s asking it to be. Of course, she could do without the terrorist attacks, shootings and narrowly avoided bombings, but in the way of work, she’s more than happy to fight her own battles, and as for David, well, she isn’t eager for that to change either.

Unlike some, the affair doesn’t bother her. The word itself sounds ugly, but that’s all. Every once in a while, when she catches sight his phone lock screen, a picture of his two children, she gets a small pang of guilt in her chest, but she quickly tells herself that she is a grown woman, and David, although eight years her junior, is a grown man, he can leave at any time.

It’s cold as the country moves into twenty nineteen. The only upside is there is no snow in London, despite the weatherman named Paul saying it would be here soon enough.

She doesn’t go into the office on New Year, she’s already made people work on Christmas Day because she’s too selfish, and maybe to starved of his affection to care about any one else, but a short phone call from him around midnight to wish her a happy new year, makes her think that it would be nice to be with family and friends, so she stays home, cleaning up random things, drinking expensive wine, mentally planning all the ways that she and David can make up for lost time when he finally get’s back.

As she lays in bed on January 1st, she looks out of the window, the curtains open slightly. Paul the weatherman was right, snow was coming.

As she watched a few flakes fall she wondered if there was much snow in Scotland, the picture of David running around with his children bringing a small smile to her face. Her smile growing as she turned over, her mind wondering to if she was there, fighting the cold with him.

All of the ways she and David could stay warm. Those thoughts would turn into her dreams for the night.

God, she missed him. She shouldn’t. But she did. She wanted him back here, in London, keeping her company, keeping her warm.

Maybe next winter things would be different, maybe she would be able to love him openly? Maybe, they would be fighting the cold together in Scotland, surrounded by the family she never had?

Or maybe this affair would be the one that never existed. Julia didn’t know, nor did she want to on New Years Day, instead, she let the image of David keeping her warm, making her smile, making her scream with pleasure fill her mind until her 5:30 alarm went off, and she counted down another day until he was escorting her to and from the office.

 

** Spring.  **

Spring was definitely her favourite season. Julia didn’t know why, but something about the colours of the sky, flowers covered in rain drop, something about it just made her smile. Not that she did smile often when out of the confines of her flat.

Today was like every other, meetings, meetings, maybe a few phone calls thrown in, but then it would be back to more meetings. She wondered if suggesting emails would be simpler, but she was almost happy to be traveling from one place to the next, the day was fresh, bright, and he was with her.

She wondered if or not to buy some lavender to go in her flat. For a moment she stops thinking like a politician, and starts thinking like a woman who likes flowers, but she quickly dismisses the thought, she’d never have time to take care of the plant. Or at least that’s what she tells herself.

“Straight home, David, if you don’t mind.” The words leave her mouth without her looking up from her phone. It’s been a long day.

“Yes, ma’am.” It’s only two words, but two words she’s happy to hear, maybe more so because they came from his lips.

If spring really is the start of new beginnings and change then she knows they need to talk. Talk about the future, maybe about the past. She can remember her words from November, and she wants to believe that she still means them now, he can’t be her PPO, but it’s now April and she hasn’t done anything about it.

When they arrive at her flat, they do their usual routine, she stands by the front door, he has a look around, and then she invites him in for a drink. He accepts.

Of course, he does, he’s had that look in his eye all day, the one that says he can’t stop thinking about her. She wonders if they’ll ever get around to having the conversation that needs to be had, or if they’ll end up in her bedroom, clothes scattered on the floor, hands over mouths, so not to alert anyone to what they were doing.

“What are we doing, David?” She is one for clarity in every other aspect of her life, but this one.

“Drinking tea, ma’am?” He replies, and Julia can tell that he is trying to avoid the conversation.

“How long do you think this can go on for? I still meant what I said at St Matthews, you being my PPO does make this more difficult.”

“Then why haven’t you had me transferred, Julia?” She couldn’t answer that.

Well, she could, but none of the reasons would be suitable when speaking to Lorraine Craddock.

Instead she ignores his question, she ignores the one she asked, the voice in her head telling her that this needs to be sorted, and stands up, taking a few steps around the coffee table to stand in front of him, waiting for him to get the hint and stand up too.

They’re going to stick to the routine they always stick to. Maybe next spring will be the start of new beginnings for her, but this year, she can’t seem to bring herself to make the changes.

She knows David has the kids this weekend, so she tells herself she’ll do some spring cleaning, the seasons calls for it, just as it apparently calls for change, she tells herself that changing the layout of her office will be a decent substitute for the conversation about her love affair with her bodyguard.

** Summer.  **

It’s summer and Julia’s living somewhere different. Still London. Still Westminster. Just a house instead of a flat, still a building that wasn’t a home.

She buys more dresses in the summer. She has some in her wardrobe, but they all remind her of her marriage, floral print dresses that Roger seemed to like. The ones she’s wearing now are much more to her own tastes. Much more to his tastes. Mainly bold colours, many of them black with small print on them, all of them professional, maybe just a little bit sexy, but they do the job well enough.

It takes a few comments, wolf whistles from passers-by and a comment from her ex-husband for her to admit that she is actually wearing the dresses for David. Of course, she is her own person, she does things that she wants, but deep down, what she wants is to have some kind of impact on him.

She thinks about it on a Thursday night. Impact? Surely, she has already made some kind of impact on him for them to be having an affair, secret meetings in the middle of the night, yet, she feels wearing dresses will have more of an impact on him.

Maybe him slipping up, maybe David becoming a little unprofessional will make it easier for her to ask for his transfer. Or maybe she wants to see him fight his urges. It’s been a long time since she’s had this affect on men, since she was able to tease him in a way that she knew he enjoyed.

Both the heat from the sun, and the heat she felt in her stomach knowing that they could get caught at any minute, makes her summer both enjoyable, yet uncomfortable, but she’s not sure she would change it next year.

She slips on another dress, this one’s red, it’s cliché, but it looks good, paired with her black heels and blazer, its warm out, even warmer in the chamber, so she knows the blazer would be coming off at some point. She both loves and hates herself for wishing that David was watching her when she did finally get rid of it. She wants to know the effect it has on him, she now considers herself almost an expert in his facial expression, however small they are.

Maybe that’s what she means by impact, she wants to impact David’s life so much that every time someone takes off a blazer in the middle of July his mind shows him images of her?

She thinks about next summer, maybe she should book some time off, go away, spend summer in a place that is built to deal with a heatwave. The thought of Disneyland crosses her mind, but she pushes it down, despite her love for David, and his children, she’s not sure she can adjust that much.

As she gets into the car upon leaving the office, she notes it’s Tom and not David.

“PS Budd had a family situation to deal with, ma’am. He should be back on duty tomorrow.” Tom gives her an explanation without her having to ask.

Clearly, he noticed the change in her facial expression when she noticed David wasn’t going to be the one escorting her home.

As they drive through London, Julia wonders if or not to text David, asking if everything was alright, but she goes against it. She doesn’t need his children or his estranged wife asking why someone called ‘Lavender’ was asking about his well-being.

By a certain point in the journey home she realises that both PC Fenton, and PC Knowles know about her and David. She’s not sure if David’s told them, or their both just good at their jobs and they’ve connected the dots.

She decided to make her love affair with David less obvious, later on that night when she invites both Tom and Kim in for a drink during a downpour.

“I may be Home Secretary, but I am not heartless,” She attempts humour with them both, but they give the generic response of ‘ma’am’.

She can’t wait for David to be back. Summer nights with him were the right kind of hot.

** Autumn.  **

She hears of David’s transfer as they’re at a set of traffic lights and she’s taking in the colour of the leaves on the trees. It’s October, and they’re taking the long route to the House of Commons to avoid Thornton Circus.

Her simple response is that she is pleased that he is taking up Counterterrorism’s offer to be a new Detective Inspector, well her professional response is. Her personal response is to request that Kim act as her Primary PPO today. She knows that David will question it, before questioning Kim, but the thing she likes about her female bodyguard is that she a simple ‘no questions asked, no small talk’ kind of woman, and on days like today, Julia appreciates it.

November rolls around and David has been given a date to be transferred, again, she finds this out in the car, once again taking the long route to a meeting to avoid driving past St Matthews, she wonders if next year things will be different, if these places will just be places, instead of sickening reminders.

“Well, it’s good that you are taking steps forward in your career, David.” She tells him, and she knows that he can hear the strain in her voice, and more than likely see the disapproval in her eyes, but she remains focused on her paperwork, once again, staring at words, but thinking of him.

David wants to move forward, she can understand that, it’s all she’s wanted to do since she got into politics, but she isn’t thinking about politics, she’s thinking about herself, she’s thinking of her own selfish needs, her own life, her own wants, she’s not thinking about him.

Or maybe she is, just not in the capacity she is meant to be.

“Thank you, ma’am.” His response is quiet, and she knows that they’ll be having words about it later.

It’s not so much she wants him to stay, it’s more she wants to stand still. Her thoughts over the course of the year have been how much different the next year could be, but she’s no longer sure she want’s it to be different. She’s enjoyed this year, the affair, the sneaking around, the parliamentary debates, the meetings, the interviews, she’s enjoyed not having the trauma that surrounded her last year.

Did she really want it to be different?

She shook her head as an answer to her own internal questions. David’s voice could be heard informing her they’d reached their destination, and she went straight into work mode, she could contemplate her life later, hopefully with a bottle of wine and his company in her bed.

“I was surprised to know you are transferring.” She tells him later than evening when they’re sharing a bottle of wine.

“You said me being here made it harder.”

“I think you know that’s not how I meant it. But I am happy for you.”

“No, you’re not.” David shot back, and she didn’t argue with him.

He was right, she wasn’t happy, she wasn’t even sure she could be supportive, but she would try.

“Why?” David asked her. “Why the sudden change?”

“It would put an end to us seeing each other.” She said, it being half of the truth, it would certainly put a stop to them sneaking around.

“I thought you wanted me right beside you?” He asked, repeating her words from this time last year.

“Things have changed, David.”

“Have they, Julia?”

She shook her head. He knew when she was lying. Just like he knew when she was sad, stressed and tired.

“Maybe next year things will be different.”

** Winter, 2020.  **

She wakes up with him next to her. It’s January 1st and she wonders if or not to go into the office.

After five minutes she decides against it. She spent enough time in the December months in that place dealing with a scandal that should have ruined her career.

She could at least add it to her resume ‘survived sex scandal with bodyguard’.

“This year will be different, love.” She hears him say some time later when she’s watching the snow fall.

“You’re sure of that?”

“We’re together, I’d say that is a pretty good start, Ms Montague.”

“Yes, I think I’d probably agree.”

She turned her attention back to the snow. Paul the weatherman got it right again this year.

She didn’t know how different the next four seasons would be compared to that last, but at least this winter David was there to keep her warm.

**Author's Note:**

> Did you manage to read it all without finding it horrible?!


End file.
